Simple ways to support your partner in the early days with your baby.
A new baby in your family can be rewarding yet challenging. The early days can be full-on. Your support can make a real difference as your partner and baby get to know each other.
When your baby arrives, everything can feel new at once. Sleep is often interrupted, and the days can blur together. Your partner may feel very tired or less confident at times.
Being there for each other during this time can make a real difference. As you both get to know your baby, you’ll gradually feel more confident in your new roles
Supporting your partner emotionally
The early days and weeks can feel challenging, especially while breastfeeding is getting established. Your partner may feel very tired at times, and it can take a while to adjust. Some days may feel overwhelming, or as if not much is getting done.
Encouragement can make a real difference. Letting your partner know they’re doing their best, and that you’re proud of them, can help build confidence as they learn to breastfeed.
Talking things through can also help. Sharing ideas or just listening can make things feel more manageable. Sometimes you may remember something you’ve learned about breastfeeding at just the right moment.
You may also hear lots of different advice from different people. It can take time to work out what suits your baby and your family. Trying a few approaches and finding your own way is all part of the process.
Practical support
It can be tempting to think the best way to help is by sharing the feeding of your baby, especially overnight.
In the early weeks, though, frequent breastfeeding helps build and protect your partner’s milk supply. Feeding your baby at the breast, day and night, is an important part of how this happens.
Offering bottles, even of expressed breastmilk, can sometimes interrupt this process, so it’s not usually the most helpful way to support.
There are lots of other ways you can make a real difference.
You might:
- bring your baby to your partner for feeds, especially at night
- make sure your partner has a drink, food or is comfortable while feeding
- take care of meals, laundry and other jobs at home
- look after older children or pets
These practical things can give your partner more time to rest, recover from the birth and focus on feeding. Even small things can take the pressure off and make the day feel more manageable.
There are many ways to be involved in caring for your baby that don’t involve feeding:
- cuddling, holding or carrying your baby
- settling after feeds
- bathing, changing nappies or soothing
- talking, singing or spending time together
These everyday moments help you get to know your baby and build your connection.
When breastfeeding takes time to get right
Breastfeeding doesn’t always fall into place straight away. Some babies learn quickly, while others take a little longer.
On harder days, it can help to:
- take things one feed at a time
- remember that learning is part of the process
- keep seeking support if something doesn’t feel right
Having good information and support can help you work through challenges as they come up.
Getting support
If you or your partner have questions or concerns, support is available. You can:
- contact an ABA breastfeeding counsellor
- use LiveChat
- attend a local ABA support group together
Sometimes a short conversation can make things feel clearer and more manageable.
Looking after both of you
A new baby can bring a mix of emotions for both of you. Feeling tired, overwhelmed or unsure at times can be part of adjusting to life with a newborn.
Sometimes, though, these feelings don’t ease or start to feel heavier. Postnatal anxiety and depression can affect mums, and partners too.
You might notice things like:
- ongoing low mood or anxiety
- feeling constantly overwhelmed or unable to cope
- trouble sleeping even when there’s a chance to rest
- feeling disconnected or not like yourself
If these feelings last for more than a couple of weeks, or are getting in the way of daily life, it’s important to seek support. You don’t have to manage this on your own. Talking to a doctor or child health nurse is a good first step.
Checking in with each other, and asking for help early, can make a real difference.
Finding your way
Caring for a new baby takes time, and every family finds their own way.
Being there, sharing the load and supporting your partner – especially in small, everyday ways – can make a real difference.
Hear from a supported mum
Without my hubby's unwavering support, there is no way I would still be feeding my twins at 15 months! He never once, during all the madness and sleepless nights, suggested we feed any other way. He took over basically all meals and feeding me was his way of feeding the babies. We had discussed during pregnancy how important it was to us that the twins be exclusively BF and that it would be my full time job for quite a few months. He picked up soooo much of the slack in caring for our older child and for our home. Could not have done it without him.
© Australian Breastfeeding Association June 2026
